My secret to staying sane.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Monday, August 10, 2009
Taking the training wheels off.
Today was a milestone day for my son. He took the training wheels off his cute little Spiderman bike. Literally, he picked up the wrench and took that last wheel off by himself. I admire the little guy. He's competitive and ambitious, a perfect teacher for me. He was anxious to try it out last night after he realized his neighbor buddy who is about 9 month younger than him has been riding his bike without the wheels. So as he washed up for bed I told him that we would do it in the morning. I find it fascinating how well he remembers exactly what he wants to. Yeah, I am going to be sexist for a minute....he's a typical male! First thing this morning he was up and dressed on his own, ready to get at it. I convinced him to eat first and let me shower so that I could help him and then we were off.... they were off.
We started with one wheel off and a very doubtful demeanor on his part. I held onto him, but let him fall if it wasn't too gnarly. It's the only way you learn, right? After a few falls he was so frustrated. Whining "I can't do it!" I had woken up with completely shifted energy, finally hopping out of that rut I had been slowly crawling out of. I was the wrong person to say "I can't" to. As I watched him fall and return to the grass below only a second later because he half- heartily tried to get back up, with no faith in himself. So here I was at 10 am rolling through the neighborhood toting spiritual advice to a 4 year old.
Believe in yourself Kaj!
Be Strong!
The only thing is it wasn't just spiritual advice, it was bike riding advice. You know the saying....just like riding a bike. I saw the irony in that saying in a whole new way. So is it that riding a bike is like life, or life is just a reflection of these great learning tasks. I am seeing lessons in everything these days. It's the simple things that we learn young, then take for granted as we grow old. Last week I was reminded of my favorite ocean lessons. Letting the waves come to you and not holding on. Have you ever seen someone playing and frolicking at the edge of the waves and then trying to hold onto them? Seems ridiculous right? But how often do we do that with things that come into our life? Picture yourself standing in the sand, watching the waves roll in. So here is a little one, a little kiss on the toes. Next one splashes up to you calves, ahhh that felt refreshing. Ok, you are ready for more. Step in and let the waves come to you. You giggle as you find your balance while letting a little harder wave hit you. It feels good to be able to let go a little bit....just a little bit. Now your in and you look out to sea. Holy Tofu-Shrimp! where the hell did that big wave come from? Too late to get out now, you must jump into the wave and ride with it. See, your hair got messed up, there might be salt water up your nose, but damn if it didn't feel good to RIDE with the FlOW for just a second.
So that little tale is exactly what I went through last week. I was visiting the beach on a whim to entertain a friend from out of town. With no bathing suit or towel I found myself drawn to the water at one point and a few minutes later standing on the sand with a sea soaked dress and some cleansed chakras. That little experience helped me remember what I need to let go of more (the little waves), and what I need not fear (the big waves~abundance).
Now back to the biking adventure. For Kaj, today might have just been a reflection of "The Little Engine That Could" but as I saw my little guy pouting, falling, whining and then laughing with joy and feeling the feeling of believing in yourself, I couldn't help but feel like I was looking in the mirror. I felt like I was the one on the grass the past few weeks. Feeling like I was helpless underneath a bike, when in reality I have control of the bike. As he whined that his younger buddy was better than him I had to tell him not to compare himself to anyone else. Good reminder Disa! Seriously today may have been a bigger milestone day for me. I was so proud that I coached Kaj through that all on my own. I felt like I had the skills, knowledge and confidence to teach my son to believe in himself. Today I totally fell into the appreciation of being a parent mode, just like jumping into a big wave of love and learning in the sweetest and cutest way possible.
Cheers to blissed out bike rides and beach trips.
Till next time!
Love,
Disa
We started with one wheel off and a very doubtful demeanor on his part. I held onto him, but let him fall if it wasn't too gnarly. It's the only way you learn, right? After a few falls he was so frustrated. Whining "I can't do it!" I had woken up with completely shifted energy, finally hopping out of that rut I had been slowly crawling out of. I was the wrong person to say "I can't" to. As I watched him fall and return to the grass below only a second later because he half- heartily tried to get back up, with no faith in himself. So here I was at 10 am rolling through the neighborhood toting spiritual advice to a 4 year old.
Believe in yourself Kaj!
Be Strong!
The only thing is it wasn't just spiritual advice, it was bike riding advice. You know the saying....just like riding a bike. I saw the irony in that saying in a whole new way. So is it that riding a bike is like life, or life is just a reflection of these great learning tasks. I am seeing lessons in everything these days. It's the simple things that we learn young, then take for granted as we grow old. Last week I was reminded of my favorite ocean lessons. Letting the waves come to you and not holding on. Have you ever seen someone playing and frolicking at the edge of the waves and then trying to hold onto them? Seems ridiculous right? But how often do we do that with things that come into our life? Picture yourself standing in the sand, watching the waves roll in. So here is a little one, a little kiss on the toes. Next one splashes up to you calves, ahhh that felt refreshing. Ok, you are ready for more. Step in and let the waves come to you. You giggle as you find your balance while letting a little harder wave hit you. It feels good to be able to let go a little bit....just a little bit. Now your in and you look out to sea. Holy Tofu-Shrimp! where the hell did that big wave come from? Too late to get out now, you must jump into the wave and ride with it. See, your hair got messed up, there might be salt water up your nose, but damn if it didn't feel good to RIDE with the FlOW for just a second.
So that little tale is exactly what I went through last week. I was visiting the beach on a whim to entertain a friend from out of town. With no bathing suit or towel I found myself drawn to the water at one point and a few minutes later standing on the sand with a sea soaked dress and some cleansed chakras. That little experience helped me remember what I need to let go of more (the little waves), and what I need not fear (the big waves~abundance).
Now back to the biking adventure. For Kaj, today might have just been a reflection of "The Little Engine That Could" but as I saw my little guy pouting, falling, whining and then laughing with joy and feeling the feeling of believing in yourself, I couldn't help but feel like I was looking in the mirror. I felt like I was the one on the grass the past few weeks. Feeling like I was helpless underneath a bike, when in reality I have control of the bike. As he whined that his younger buddy was better than him I had to tell him not to compare himself to anyone else. Good reminder Disa! Seriously today may have been a bigger milestone day for me. I was so proud that I coached Kaj through that all on my own. I felt like I had the skills, knowledge and confidence to teach my son to believe in himself. Today I totally fell into the appreciation of being a parent mode, just like jumping into a big wave of love and learning in the sweetest and cutest way possible.
Cheers to blissed out bike rides and beach trips.
Till next time!
Love,
Disa
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Manifest the MacBook
My big creative brain is buzzing. Last night I purchased a Flip Mino camcorder. I have been wanting one of these for quite awhile so that I can post videos for my Meetup group and do some fun video demos and vlogs. So I finally got one, and to my frustration this trusty pc of mine can barely handle it. You see I have been longing for a MacBook also. My computer is upstairs in my room and during the day it's pretty much impossible to do any computer work in the heat. Also it keeps me away from my son. So I figured it's time to manifest the MacBook. A MacBook would increase my productivity and ability to get more juicy fun blogging, advice and fun to you all by 1000%. I actually have a huge project idea that includes lots of daily videos. Mommies out there will especially love them. But I can't be waiting two hours to have a two minute video upload and then not even be able to get it online. So I am reaching out. Please help me manifest this MacBook! I am calling in a donation drive. Disa's Delicious Donations, that is. The way it will work is that you will receive a lovely gift from yours truly based on the amount you donate. So it's win win situation!
$5= two for the price of one macaroons (one bag of chocolate and one bag of matcha), or my favorite smoothie and juice recipe booklet.
$10= a raw book or superfoods
$20= 4 bags of macaroons ($20value) plus some superfoods
$50= superfoods and 1kg organic raw cashews, or for locals- in house green smoothie mini party
$100= enter to win a date with me! I know I sound like a typical Leo now but this really is a prize! I am newly single but pretty much off the market due to my hectic schedule and drive to focus on my new ventures. You will of course need to make sure to get yourself to the LA area or get me to you. :) Also this could be an in house raw dessert cheffing for your own private party or date. (Same thing applies for the distance.)
Feel free to donate how ever much you want and put a note as to what type of gift you would prefer. I may have to get creative as things run out so feel free to suggest. Also if you have any products or services that you would like to donate they will be so wonderfully loved and appreciated.
Thanks for the Support!
Love!
Disa
$5= two for the price of one macaroons (one bag of chocolate and one bag of matcha), or my favorite smoothie and juice recipe booklet.
$10= a raw book or superfoods
$20= 4 bags of macaroons ($20value) plus some superfoods
$50= superfoods and 1kg organic raw cashews, or for locals- in house green smoothie mini party
$100= enter to win a date with me! I know I sound like a typical Leo now but this really is a prize! I am newly single but pretty much off the market due to my hectic schedule and drive to focus on my new ventures. You will of course need to make sure to get yourself to the LA area or get me to you. :) Also this could be an in house raw dessert cheffing for your own private party or date. (Same thing applies for the distance.)
Feel free to donate how ever much you want and put a note as to what type of gift you would prefer. I may have to get creative as things run out so feel free to suggest. Also if you have any products or services that you would like to donate they will be so wonderfully loved and appreciated.
Thanks for the Support!
Love!
Disa
I quit my job!
It's been nearly a month since I have been job free. Even though I have had the intention to blog way more often, the truth is that I have had been so caught up in the whirlwind and the whole experience of being FREE! So what have I been up to? Let's see, cleansing, juicing, partying, playing, unbaking, connecting, traveling and pretty much just being in the flow. This summer feels like what summer is meant to be. For the past few weekends I have been so busy I had to choose where and what I wanted to do. Opportunities for fun and divine work, and both at the same time, have been popping up everywhere, everyday! The adventures and stories are too numerous and there will be more to come. I wanted to touch more on why I decided to quit my job.
It probably seems ironic that the employment assistant for a state funded university would willingly quit her job, when her co-workers were fearful of furloughs and lay-offs. But there was one big thing that separated this girl from the rest of the pack. It's the F word....... Faith! I started to really operate on faith. At some point I had no choice and it was effortless and instinctual to have complete faith that I would be taken care of. I could say just that, but I have to share the way it happened, because it honestly is a good reminder for me. Back when I was prepping for Raw Spirit Santa Barbara I decided to make some macaroons to sell while I helped out at the LoveSnax booth. I had also wanted to make my natural hair product. I ended up spending a nice chunk of money on these things, not worrying that they were out of my means, becuase I had expected to make a profit. I soon came to realize that my energy was not right for brining in a profit. The intense energy of the gathering and the full moon had me dealing with so many other issues that I was barely even present enought to sell. I found myself torn between enjoying the experience with my son and being a businessperson, amounst other things I had to work through that weekend. I also found that I had spent my monthly paycheck in about 4 days! It's embarrassing to admit, but has to be told, because this was the biggest factor for my shift. I remember sitting there in the booth, reading my email, realizing what was going on and instead of panicing I knew, I just knew that everything was going to be alright. All my bills were already paid. All I really needed was grocery and gas money. It was so easy, just to know that I was going to be taken care of. Because I always have been. When I returned I had an opportunity to do some small catering for a friend. So I got some more cash and had so much fun making the food. A week or so after raw spirit I came down with some funky cold. I thought it was from stress and an overdose of "Have A" Chips. As I laid in my bed with a cold that had moved to my chest I had another awakening. It was my weekend without my son, if there were any time to do some work it would be now, but I was disabled. As much as I tried to push myself, my body said STOP. To the point where I felt it hard to breath and had to lay down with a castor oil pack on my chest. There is not much you can do at this point but be alone with your thoughts. So I started to feel the anger I had at myself for messing up, I started to feel the longing I had to have it all right now! I wanted the house, the business, the lover, the life all right now. I was sick of waiting in the dead end job and pretending like at some point I would have saved the perfect amount to have it all. I came to terms with it by simply reminding myself that it is okay to want it all and let it go and at that moment my chest opened up. I literally got something off my chest and could now process onto the next big step. So I realized that I had been holding onto this job so I could save money, yet I blew a months worth of work in 4 days! Taking this information and seeing how easily I had been able to manifest work afterward I realized that spending the majority of my time working off of fear was no use to me. The signs and intuition I had confirming that more money would be made off of passion and faith were stonger than ever. The following day I found myself completely in the flow, manifesting a photoshoot for my website and enjoying a concert with a loved one. As I settled down late that evening I could not get to sleep. Even though I was falling asleep at the concert, once I was home and hit with the reality of what lay ahead the next day I found myself in super overeating mode. I couldn't sleep because of the anxiety, so I drowned my body with heavy food to get to sleep. The next morning I woke up for this first time in three years hating my job. I had no reason to not want to go into work. I had the most amazing boss, my coworkers are some of my best friends and I basically had enough free time to do whatever I pleased at work. Once I got to my desk I sat down and felt as though I was a caged robot. My head was racing with ideas of what I could be doing instead of being there. So I got out my notebook and jotted them down. What would I do with this day if it were completely mine? There is was, I had a whole day scheduled of productive work, on the projects I felt passionate about. But the fear, of what others would think, just plain fear of leaving a stable source of income was still there. So I asked the angels for confirmation. I knew in my heart that it was time to leave, but I wanted someone else to tell me. Later that day, after I had forgotten about my desire to hear verbal confirmation, my coworker pulled me into her office and told me just what I needed to hear. She told me that I wasn't there, she could see that my heart wasn't in it, that I was not myself at all and that it was showing up in my work performance. Wow, that was it! The next morning I went into my bosses office and put in my notice.
The next two weeks provided a challenge and journey also, not to mention the first month of freedom. I will go more into detail in future posts. I know that there are other people out there going through the same type of thing and I want to offer my story to you in whatever capacity in needs to serve.
Till next time!
Best going away gift ever! The office pooled organic produce straight from there home gardens and gave me an abundant basket of love. Not to mention that cute handmade apron that now hangs in my new office....my certified kitchen by the beach!
It probably seems ironic that the employment assistant for a state funded university would willingly quit her job, when her co-workers were fearful of furloughs and lay-offs. But there was one big thing that separated this girl from the rest of the pack. It's the F word....... Faith! I started to really operate on faith. At some point I had no choice and it was effortless and instinctual to have complete faith that I would be taken care of. I could say just that, but I have to share the way it happened, because it honestly is a good reminder for me. Back when I was prepping for Raw Spirit Santa Barbara I decided to make some macaroons to sell while I helped out at the LoveSnax booth. I had also wanted to make my natural hair product. I ended up spending a nice chunk of money on these things, not worrying that they were out of my means, becuase I had expected to make a profit. I soon came to realize that my energy was not right for brining in a profit. The intense energy of the gathering and the full moon had me dealing with so many other issues that I was barely even present enought to sell. I found myself torn between enjoying the experience with my son and being a businessperson, amounst other things I had to work through that weekend. I also found that I had spent my monthly paycheck in about 4 days! It's embarrassing to admit, but has to be told, because this was the biggest factor for my shift. I remember sitting there in the booth, reading my email, realizing what was going on and instead of panicing I knew, I just knew that everything was going to be alright. All my bills were already paid. All I really needed was grocery and gas money. It was so easy, just to know that I was going to be taken care of. Because I always have been. When I returned I had an opportunity to do some small catering for a friend. So I got some more cash and had so much fun making the food. A week or so after raw spirit I came down with some funky cold. I thought it was from stress and an overdose of "Have A" Chips. As I laid in my bed with a cold that had moved to my chest I had another awakening. It was my weekend without my son, if there were any time to do some work it would be now, but I was disabled. As much as I tried to push myself, my body said STOP. To the point where I felt it hard to breath and had to lay down with a castor oil pack on my chest. There is not much you can do at this point but be alone with your thoughts. So I started to feel the anger I had at myself for messing up, I started to feel the longing I had to have it all right now! I wanted the house, the business, the lover, the life all right now. I was sick of waiting in the dead end job and pretending like at some point I would have saved the perfect amount to have it all. I came to terms with it by simply reminding myself that it is okay to want it all and let it go and at that moment my chest opened up. I literally got something off my chest and could now process onto the next big step. So I realized that I had been holding onto this job so I could save money, yet I blew a months worth of work in 4 days! Taking this information and seeing how easily I had been able to manifest work afterward I realized that spending the majority of my time working off of fear was no use to me. The signs and intuition I had confirming that more money would be made off of passion and faith were stonger than ever. The following day I found myself completely in the flow, manifesting a photoshoot for my website and enjoying a concert with a loved one. As I settled down late that evening I could not get to sleep. Even though I was falling asleep at the concert, once I was home and hit with the reality of what lay ahead the next day I found myself in super overeating mode. I couldn't sleep because of the anxiety, so I drowned my body with heavy food to get to sleep. The next morning I woke up for this first time in three years hating my job. I had no reason to not want to go into work. I had the most amazing boss, my coworkers are some of my best friends and I basically had enough free time to do whatever I pleased at work. Once I got to my desk I sat down and felt as though I was a caged robot. My head was racing with ideas of what I could be doing instead of being there. So I got out my notebook and jotted them down. What would I do with this day if it were completely mine? There is was, I had a whole day scheduled of productive work, on the projects I felt passionate about. But the fear, of what others would think, just plain fear of leaving a stable source of income was still there. So I asked the angels for confirmation. I knew in my heart that it was time to leave, but I wanted someone else to tell me. Later that day, after I had forgotten about my desire to hear verbal confirmation, my coworker pulled me into her office and told me just what I needed to hear. She told me that I wasn't there, she could see that my heart wasn't in it, that I was not myself at all and that it was showing up in my work performance. Wow, that was it! The next morning I went into my bosses office and put in my notice.
The next two weeks provided a challenge and journey also, not to mention the first month of freedom. I will go more into detail in future posts. I know that there are other people out there going through the same type of thing and I want to offer my story to you in whatever capacity in needs to serve.
Till next time!
Best going away gift ever! The office pooled organic produce straight from there home gardens and gave me an abundant basket of love. Not to mention that cute handmade apron that now hangs in my new office....my certified kitchen by the beach!
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